I have a Churchillian relationship with alcohol: I can crack jokes and govern England and do anything I want to do. Except not drink.
We’re young. We’re supposed to drink too much. We’re supposed to have bad attitudes and shag each other’s brains out. We are designed to party. This is it. Yeah, so a few of us will overdose or go mental. But Charles Darwin said you can’t make an omelet without breaking a few eggs. And that’s what it’s all about – breaking eggs! And by eggs, I do mean, getting twatted on a cocktail of Class A’s. If you could just see yourselves! It breaks my heart. You’re wearing cardigans! We had it all. We fucked up bigger and better than any generation that came before us. We were so beautiful! We’re screw-ups. I’m a screw-up and I plan to be a screw-up until my late 20s, maybe even my early 30s. And I will shag my own mother before I let her… or anyone else, take that away from me!
We were approaching Madrid airport on an Iberia flight from Barcelona when our tour manager, who was sitting next to me, grabbed hold of my left leg. I said, ‘Fuck off Ian,’ but he wouldn’t let go so I hit him. I then looked at the other passengers and noticed they had the same look of complete panic on their faces as he did. I asked him what was wrong and he said, ‘We nearly died.’ Apparently, the plane had approached the runway almost on its side with the left wing no more than six feet off the ground. Just before impact, the pilot had managed to right the plane so avoiding disaster and probably our death. For the rest of the day, everyone got completely drunk and told all and sundry how much they loved them. I felt strangely distant as I had not shared the experience.
I had a breakthrough, I think my life just became calmer, I gave up drinking. My priorities changed as I had a young daughter. The group didn’t want me to record for the Think Tank album… so I took it as a sign to leave.
What is this I’m drinking? It’s disgusting. It’s like a choc ice fell into a bottle of bleach. This is children’s booze!